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Relief

Relief

On Fridays… we “shhhh” the inner critic and run freely with our words.  Allowing ourselves to exercise our free-flowing words with a one word prompt Then we join together and encourage each other – kind of like a Flashmob for Writers.

  

Five Minute Friday – 


Relief
Where do you struggle?
When will the pain end?

When does relief come?  What shape does it take?  What song does it sing?

When we love deeply ~ When we live our lives fully
There is always pain to encounter

Relief may come in the daily whispers of I love you 
It may come in the hugs
In the phone calls
In the comfort of family or a friend

Love deeply, live your life fully, hold a hand and embrace some relief
It is on its way

It comes to lift your spirit
To stand you up again
To help you to move on and move forward

It comes small and it comes big
And it arrives in a gentle whisper, or like a warm breath, or like a hand on the shoulder
Relief tells you it’s going to be ok

Relief is in the love you give and the love you receive
Embrace it
 

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Friend

On Fridays… we “shhhh” the inner critic and run freely with our words.  Allowing ourselves to exercise our free-flowing words with a one word prompt from our fearless community leader Lisa Jo Baker.  Then we join together and encourage each other – kind of like a Flashmob for Writers.

www.lisajobaker.com

HDT friend quote

Friend

Recently I added two new friends to my Facebook page … friends from middle school. One remembered me and the other had some vague familiarity of my name.

Many people who know me well know that I have friends all over the country and a few overseas. They are all a part of my life because I have lived in many places…. and in order to keep in touch with them I have used snail mail, email, then Facebook – which really expanded my capabilities of finding a few friends that I had lost touch with many decades ago.

Occasionally, I see posters saying “Keep people in your life that motivate you, love you, make you happy, etc.”  And to “Let Go” those that don’t…

Basically it encourages you to walk away from the people in your life who are negative, or who drag you down … but I believe eventually we would all be ALONE if we followed that advice.

{WE} could eventually be that negative person that someone feels led to “let go.”

I have friends of all kinds … They all have distinct personalities and opinions and their own personal soapboxes that they stand on in life… Sometimes I join them on that soapbox, other times I just read or listen to whatever they are passionate about.

Not everything they say is nice, or beneficial, but I can’t discount them as a friend simply on the merit that I think they are “negative” … each one brings a little piece of something to my life.

Honestly? A few years ago someone said something to me that was pretty negative and I was really at a loss for words. It hurt, and it hurt deep.

It also made me truly look at myself and see …

while I was pointing out the faults of others …

I had COMPLETELY lost sight of my own sinful nature.

I could have easily let that person go, but I was taught a valuable lesson that day.  An important lesson that I try to exercise daily.

A friend loves at all times

Proverbs 17:17

 

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Five Minute Friday ~ See

See

~If only I could make you see~

If I only had a week to show you love

through God’s eyes ~ I’d show you kindness

To a stranger, the downcast, the poor and the hungry …

If I only had a day to show you love

through God’s eyes ~ I’d show you compassion

For your close friends and co-workers …

If I only had an hour to show you love ~ I’d show you forgiveness.

For your family and for yourself …

If I only had a minute to show you love ~ I’d show you salvation.

~I’d introduce you to the breathe of life~

that beckons your heart

to turn toward Him.

For you to reflect His light, to heal your soul, to change your world

Come SEE with me

***

Colossians 3:12

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.

*****

On Fridays… we “shhhh” the inner critic and run freely with our words.  Allowing to exercise our free-flowing words with a word prompt from our fearless community leader Lisa Jo Baker.  Then we join together and encourage each other – kind of like a Flashmob for Writers.

www.lisajobaker.com

 

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Blog Rest? Nope!

Heart Tree

I have to say that I truly need a rest from writing in my blog.  There just never seems to be enough hours in the day to type, edit, and publish.

Unfortunately that idea doesn’t seem to connect with any other part of my brain.  It’s on overload most mornings when I wake up – just raring to go!

On a regular basis now I literally grab my phone on the nightstand beside the bed to type notes.  It’s sometimes too early when I wake up and have thoughts roar through my head that I can’t be trusted to remember them by the time I get to the kitchen table with coffee, pen and paper.  Once my brain has started the download I have to be ready to write down things that I pondered in my dreams or while simply lying awake at 4:30 a.m.

Anxiety usually favors the early hours to startle me awake physically and it usually gets me thinking about stuff I don’t care to think about, so writing helps.  But it’s a chore and a joy and sometimes something wonderful comes out of it.

I clearly heard his alarm, but I tried to roll over and go back to sleep.  Just maybe I could…. but no.

My thoughts were heading down hopeless paths of regret, guilt and sadness simultaneously so I wrote him a letter.  It helped me and later he read it and I think he was good with it too.

I ask a lot from the people I love.  Forgiveness, support, understanding, compassion, and on and on the list goes.

He gives it, unconditionally.

He loves me deeply and never out of pity or obligation.

He understands my pains and my messiness.

He understands my need for a lifting of the burdens from my shoulders.

He reaches into my space – invading whatever emotion I’m holding there – and loves me.

It’s not easy.  I’m feeling unlovable quite often lately.

Some days I feel so distant and weak that I simply can’t lift my hand to reach out to him.

It comes in waves, regardless of my declaration that “today will be better.”

I convey to him that I need to hear …

“We can make it.”  “I love you.”  “I know you’re struggling.”  “I know you’re trying.”

Lately I apologize as often as I tell him I love him and I rely on him to hold me together when it’s easier to fall apart.

We won’t give up.

That’s our LOVE song…we won’t give up.

I’m so thankful for this man that I met at age 15 – That was 32 years ago but it was like yesterday…

I heard a song the other day that said –

“When does a scar become a tattoo?”

“When does the sky turn back to blue?”

“When does this broken heart that I’m holding beat on it’s own?”

I imagine those scars are healing, whether I can see it happening or not.

And I know the sky is blue, even when the days are cloudy and grey.

And that broken heart?

Well, he holds me and loves me and his heart beats for two.

 
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Posted by on December 16, 2013 in Life, in general

 

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Five Minute Friday – Fly

heartTreeMosaic

~Fly~

I long to fly

continuously through the air

stopping only at the destinations that I chose.

When I arrive I long to tarry

soaking in the beauty

of land and people.

Whether it’s here

or another country

I long to go.

To escape

and feel free

and unfettered.

To stroll

or bike

or rent a car.

~To find the lost things-

the pieces of me

that long to be

reunited.

In each place I have been

I have left

pieces

of

the

whole.

If I could fly

I’d gather them

and then return

~complete~

But I believe

these pieces-

they are of my heart.

And I believe

they belong

where I left them

~with others~

So, here’s the deal… Fridays are for fun.  Unedited writing that’s good for the soul – You are always welcome to join us… http://lisajobaker.com/

 

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Five Minute Friday – What Mom Did

moms geranium

What Mom Did

She struggled.  She made do.  She died way before any of us were prepared for her to go.  She spent most of her adult life existing between the pain in her body and the frustration of a so-so marriage.  She seemed weak, frail, and resigned to this life as it was given to her.

But, when I needed her, she was strong.

I was 17 when I started getting sick – the beginning of my Senior year in high school.  I was in pain, and losing my ability to walk well, losing the sense of hunger, having double vision and I spent almost the whole night crying because I couldn’t sleep.

At 17, my Mom slept in my bed with me because she didn’t know how else to comfort her child … It was just what I needed.

She mysteriously kept her own worry and her back-wrenching pain at bay while I was subjected to many tests.  Some were administered in a clinic, others in an overnight stay at a hospital.  Four months later they knew it was not Multiple Sclerosis, Myasthenia Gravis, or Polio. It was an uncommon viral illness called Guillain-Barré Syndrome – and it would just Go Away …

She sighed heavily the day the doctor called and cried tears of joy as she hugged me. She sighed relief for us all.

She had watched me shrink, watched my clothes droop, watched my muscles disappear in clumps, and managed to keep her cool.

Today, as I remember this one small moment in our life together, my heart swells at the thought of her unselfish love.

The lesson is not lost on this body filled with pain.  She was a rock.  May I be the same for those that I hold dearly.

 
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Posted by on February 22, 2013 in Five Minute Friday Flash Mob

 

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I have loved you…

heart shaped hands

The summer we began dating for the second time – I didn’t see any one else but you in my future. I was accused of being young and naive. Somewhere out there in the world, I was told, there were so many opportunities waiting for me. I’m not sure I saw what these “wise” people could see in my future.

I saw a blank sheet.  I saw only you.

I have loved you since I was a teenager when they whispered “She’s too young.”

I loved you when we were happy, and somewhat oblivious

I loved you when we embraced parenthood…three times and they were all girls

I loved you when you were gone overseas…no matter how many times you had to go

And I loved you when we made horrible mistakes, faced pain, anger, and uncertainty

And today, I love you more

Today, I can’t imagine a tomorrow without you.

For better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health

Happy Valentine’s Day

 
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Posted by on February 14, 2013 in Life, in general

 

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